This is a question my husband had when I wanted to hire a doula for Bryson’s birth. I reassured him they didn’t. When we met with Alison and talked with her about her role, he felt much better about it. Then after the birth he wondered why we didn’t have one for each birth?
He LOVED having a doula! He was not replaced at all, rather he felt as if he had a huge weight lifted off his shoulders, he could relax and enjoy the birth and let someone else (Alison) worry about the details.
I have found that sometimes dads are worried about this. But if you ask any dad who has had a doula at his child’s birth, they are the biggest supporters and say it is great!
Here is a great chart explaining why doulas do NOT replace dads!
From the start I wanted to have a doula at the birth of our daughter – all my explanation didn’t quite sell him on the idea, he too was afraid of his job being usurped.
We ended up having a private prenatal class (whole day) in our home and found out that our educator also worked as a doula… once the days was at it’s end we had clicked with her so much that HE excitedly asked her if she wanted to be our doula. She suggested that we discuss it together and give her a call if that’s what we both wanted (which we did).
We had a fantastic birth experience with our doula and midwife – labored at home until 7cm, transferred to the hospital. We used the birth stool and she was born within a couple hours with gentle pushing and breathing through only about 3-5 contractions. It was amazing!!!
We all functioned as a fantastic team and we both agree that if we get pregnant again phone call number one will be to our midwife and number two would be to our doula!
Oops… i think i made the timing sound wrong… to clarify, that was a couple hours from the time we arrived at the hospital that she was born…
The process was much longer than that… about 27+ hours from water breaking until birth… over 12 hours of really good, “hard-work” labor… 🙂